10 Steps to Help Heal After Pet Loss

Losing a beloved pet can be one of the most heart-wrenching experiences in life and is a deeply vulnerable journey. It is normal to feel emotions ranging from sadness and despair to anger and guilt. Unfortunately, many people dismiss pet loss as not as serious as other types of grief, which can make the process harder.

"Pet loss is often not recognized as a significant loss, and this may cause those grieving their animals to feel that their loss is less important and that they don't belong," says John James, Grief Recovery Institute. 

For many, pets are not just animals—they are family members and sources of unconditional love. "We frequently speak with families who express that the loss of their pet is akin to losing a parent, or even worse," said Dr. Elizabeth Benson, hospice veterinarian and founder of Paws into Grace, a Southern California-based company that specializes in end-of-life pet care. "We support grief support programs like The Guides because we know the importance of allowing families the space to honor their pets and experience a healing process.”

Here are 10 steps for you to take now to ensure you are soothing your heart and taking the healthy steps towards emotional completion. 

Avoid minimizing your feelings or comparing your grief to others. Losing a pet is a real and valid loss, and your emotions deserve space.

Grief can bring up a mix of emotions—sadness, guilt, relief, even anger. Let yourself experience these emotions without judgment.

Think about your pet's life and your relationship. Were there things left unsaid? Regrets? Special moments? Recognizing these feelings helps in processing grief.

Distracting yourself with work, food, or immediately getting another pet might suppress grief rather than heal it. Take time to process before making big decisions. More often than not, when people do not process the grief of losing a beloved pet and replace them immediately, the emotional connection with the new pet suffers; a gentle reminder that is not fair to your new family member. 

Find someone who will listen without trying to "fix" you. This could be a friend, therapist/wellness practitioner, or grief support group.

Grief can disrupt your daily life. Try incorporating small, grounding rituals—like lighting a candle in their honor, taking a mindful walk, or journaling about your pet—to provide comfort during this transition.

It is okay to miss your pet and cherish the joyful moments. Sharing stories can bring comfort. If your family has a child who needs extra support, find great resources and books about pet loss for kids at Red Rover. 

Create a ritual, plant a tree, make a scrapbook, or donate to an animal shelter in their name. Honoring their memory helps with closure. Helen Woodward Animal Center, San Diego Humane Society, Frosted Faces, The Animal Pad and a quick google search you will find many more animal rescue organizations in San Diego that would be a wonderful way to honor your loved one. Another option would be to volunteer if your spirit is calling you to do so -  when you are feeling helpless, get helpful. 

Grief affects your entire being. Prioritize gentle movement, proper rest, nourishing foods, and activities that support your well-being. Seeking out acupuncture to address the physical symptoms of grief is deeply impactful. Saffron & Sage and San Diego Herbal Medicine & Acupuncture are incredible resources with some of the best practitioners in the city. 

Unresolved grief can linger, impacting other areas of life. Grieving the loss of a beloved pet is deeply personal, and finding the right support can make all the difference. The Guides Holistic Therapies offers a local Pet Loss Program -- a compassionate, structured path to help you process your emotions and honor your pet's memory As part of this process, writing a goodbye letter to your pet—expressing love, gratitude, apologies, or even frustrations—can be incredibly healing. This program helps you complete your grief, so you can move forward while still honoring your pet's memory.

Kimberly Blair is a multimodality practitioner and the founder of The Guides Holistic Therapies in San Diego. With a background in psychology and an MBA, Kimberly's uniquely dynamic approach integrates Clinical Hypnotherapy, Conscious Connected Breathwork, Grief Recovery, Reiki, and Sound Therapy to support deep emotional healing and transformation. She is passionate about guiding others through grief and life's challenges, helping them reclaim power, balance, and a renewed sense of hope. In-person sessions are available at Pacific Beach and La Jolla locations. Learn more about Kimberly and her practice at www.theholisticguides.com